And she said...

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I thought this picture was way cool.

Leave your reactions.

Sorry about the crazy design changes all day today. Having only been here a week, I'm still figuring things out. Eventually, I will find a design that I love! Until then... things may be a bit crazy.

The perfectionist in me is coming out.

I'm taking medication.

It's a process.




(Tongue in cheek)

Check out my new chatterbox! Be sure to answer my question of the day..

I just realized something about myself.

I'm. A. Homebody.

C called to ask me if I wanted to go with him to my in-laws house to pick up a lawnmower. In no uncertain terms, I told him that I definitely did NOT want to tag along..

There are many different reasons why I like to stay home.

1. I don't really enjoy my in-laws company. (Thats another blog...)
2. Getting 3 kids ready to go sucks.
3. Someone always ends up getting mad.
4. C and Ally inevitably always end up arguing.
5. Riding in the car is boring.
6. I never know how Logan is going to react to being in the car. Sometimes he is fine, sometimes it's a huge ordeal.
7. I like being at home.
8. I have to pee alot. (I think it's obvious why this is a reason to stay home.)

I hate that I have become such a stick-n-the-mud when it comes to going places with the children. It's just that it's soo hard.

Are you a homebody?

1. What time is it? 2:45

2. Name as it appears on your birth certificate? Jennifer Lynne Nunya

3. Number of candles on your last birthday cake? I can't remember the last time I had a birthday cake.

4. Birthday? - June 16th

5. Pets? 2 dogs - Molly and Dixie (Pound puppies aka mutts)

6. Hair color? - auburn

7. Eye color? - blueish-green

8. How much do you love your job? I love it, but I get bored.

9. Hometown? small town texasville - 2000 people

10. Town you live in now? bigger texasville

11. Favorite food? - ALL (Italian, gourmet, mexican and homecooking)

12. Been to Africa? - no

13. Been toilet papering? - yes, back in the day...

14. Love someone so much it made you cry? - Yes...

15. Been in a car accident? - yes, Had to have plastic surgery at 18 because of it.

16. croutons or bacon bits? - Both!

17. favorite day of the week? - Tuesday

18. favorite word or phrase? - I like men who have a future, and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde

19. favorite restaurant? - Commanders Palace

20. favorite flower? - Tulip

21. favorite sport to watch? - Football

22. favorite drink? - coffee

23. favorite ice cream? - Breyers \"Baileys\" Ice cream

24. Disney or Warner Brothers? - Disney

25. favorite fast-food restaurant? - Sonic

26. Color of bedroom carpet? - Mocha

27. How many times did you fail your driver\'s license test? - Zero

28. Before this one, who did you get your last email from? - A scrapbooking group update.

29. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? - Pier 1

30. What do you do most often when you\'re bored? - Read, write, surf the net

31. What\'s the most annoying thing people ask you? - Is that your natural haircolor? (Then they don\'t believe me when I say yes. If your not going to believe me, then dont ask.)

32. When is your bedtime? - Anytime after 11 pm

33. Who will respond to this the quickest? - Hmmm.. No one may respond.

34. Who is the person least likely to respond? - My mother. She wont leave comments for some reason. lol.

35. Favorite TV show? - CSI, American Idol

36. Last person you went to dinner with? - C

37. Ford or Chevy? - Ford (C has a Ford, but I have a Dodge)

38. Do you have a crush on someone? If so, who? -Juniper, only because of her love of music.. I think thats groovy, baby! Hehe..

39. Time you finished this? 3:02

I was asking about headers earlier in TBlurt, when I realized that it would really behoove me to know how to just do it myself. I found a great Paintshop Pro 7.0 tutorial site online and figured it out!
www.mardiweb.com


Check out my header! I know its simple, but hey it's my first one...

Thanks ceeceesun for the great header. Check out the main tblog page for more great headers by this talented tblogger!

I found this journal entry by Naomi while surfing and really loved it... I love the way she writes; her analogies are so expressive and the words flow in a way that encourages you to keep reading.

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When is a pocket not just a pocket?
I have an absent-minded fascination with pockets. Like other people, I'm not aware of my hands sliding into the front pockets of my pants, jean skirt, or hooded sweater. I don't realize until I'm suddenly wide awake conscious of my fingers hooked into the corners of my back pockets. But I love pockets.

When I was a child, my father would yell at me when he would find me walking around with my hands in my pockets. To this day, I still don't understand why I had to listen to his five minute rant about my incessant need to have my hands in my pocket. And when I was young, I was terribly self-conscious of trying to keep from hiding my hands in the warmth of those sewn heavens.

Angry fists can be restrained by pockets. A thin layer of material reminding me to calm down, think about my next moment...lessen the claw tight in my pocket, in my heart. Winter days bitterly biting my skin. My face is freezing and my toes are shivering, but my hands have burrowed down in the pockets of my coat like the groundhog hiding from Jack Frost. Memories of being three walking beside my grandfather and trying to share his pockets.

To people close enough to see me in my weakest moments, I've described my wounded self like this. I'm walking along carrying something in my pocket. Something I don't even know I have. Something that I don't even know what it is. But it's something extremely important in the existence of my life. I'm walking along, going about my life when suddenly I discover it's gone. Perhaps there's a hole in my pocket. Perhaps it just climbed its way to the rim of my pocket as things do and it fell out. But now it's gone. And I'm frantic. I can't go on without placing it back in my pocket. But what is it? Where did it fall out? When did I lose it? I've walked 1000s of steps and it could be anywhere along the way. And I still don't know what it is. And I can't go on until it's back in my pocket and I've grown unconscious of it again. It will be when it's safely in pocket that I will be ok.

Perhaps that's the fascination. Or perhaps it's likening pockets to this mini womb where I'm safe and warm and shielded against the scary unknown.

Or perhaps a pocket is just a pocket.

Today I feel the need to talk about something very near and dear to my heart. Autism. Logan is now 9 years old and was diagnosed with autism at the age of 3. This will be the story of how we learned of his autism, the devastation, the sorrow, the fears, and then the acceptance and realization of what autism really is and what it has come to mean for our family. Don't worry; this is not a sad story, not for us as it turns out. There have been and we are confident there will be in the future- many reasons for celebration and joy in the life of our son who is so often marching to the beat of his own drummer. I would like to share with the many out there who do not know what autism really is, to do away with the misconceptions and to dispel some of the myths and fears that often come to mind when people hear the word "autism." Sadly enough, I have come to find that a large majority of the books in our local library portray only the form of autism that is totally disabling and hopeless. I have also noticed that television also like to portray those "textbook" cases of severe and profound autism. So, here I will be spilling my thoughts and feelings because I am hoping to reach others who need that contact with someone who has been there and done that, someone who is there and doing that, someone who understands and wants to help. I remember well those early days when I felt so alone in the new world of autism. So here we go..... get ready to read, to laugh a little, cry a little and send up a little cheer in those times of triumph
First a bit of background on the disease/disorder.

[i]What Does Autism Mean?
Autism is a kind of brain disorder that causes kids to experience the world differently from the way most other kids do. Those differences make it hard for kids with autism to communicate with others and react to things going on around them in the usual ways.

When someone smiles, for instance, a kid without autism knows that the smiling person is happy or being friendly. Kids with autism, however, have trouble connecting a person's gestures - such as a smile or frown - with the person's feelings. It's difficult, too, for kids with autism to link words with their meanings. Imagine trying to talk with someone or learn from a teacher if you couldn't make sense of their words and gestures and couldn't come up with the right words to express your own thoughts!

Autism also creates a confusing world of senses. Quiet sounds may be loud and distracting to a kid with autism. A sudden noise could be terrifying. A person's touch might set off a wave of strong sensations - like when a chill gives you the shivers, but much worse.

The disorder makes some kids with autism behave differently, too. Some flap their hands or say certain words over and over, have temper tantrums, or play only with one particular toy. Most kids with autism don't like changes in routines, which means they like to stay on a schedule that is always pretty much the same. They tend to keep to themselves and many can't communicate without special help.

Autism is a problem in the way the brain works, probably due to too few or too many brain chemicals called neurotransmitters . It can range from mild to severe. Some kids with autism have fewer or less serious problems. For example, learning and reasoning can be especially difficult for many kids with autism, but others may learn quickly.

In the United States, over 500,000 people have autism or one of several other similar disabilities. Doctors call these similar disabilities pervasive developmental disorders, or PDDs. About one in every 500 kids has some type of autism or PDD. Kids who have autism usually start having symptoms between the ages of 18 and 36 months. More boys have autism than girls.

Autism isn't contagious, which means you can't catch it from someone who has it.

Nobody knows for sure what causes autism. Some scientists think that some kids might be more likely to get autism because it or similar disorders run in their families.

Knowing autism's exact causes is hard because the human brain is very complicated. The brain contains over 100 billion nerve cells called neurons. Each neuron may have hundreds or thousands of connections to other nerve cells in the brain and body. The connections (which are made by releasing neurotransmitters) let different neurons in different areas of the brain - areas that help you see, feel, move, remember, and much more - work together.

For some reason, some of the cells and connections in an autistic kid's brain - especially those that affect communication, emotions, and senses - don't develop properly or get damaged. Scientists are still trying to understand how and why this happens. Personally, I believe that Logan's Autism was caused by Thimerosol, a nasty little product that drug companies thought they should put in our children’s vaccines. Thimerosol is [b]Mercury[/b] pure and simple. If you put a tiny drop of mercury into a gallon jug of water, it would be enough to kill 25 grown men. They fed this to our children, under the impression that it would PREVENT diseases. The purpose of Thimerosol in vaccines was simply to help the medicine last longer. They used a deadly substance as a preservative.[/i]

Logan was a very bright child. He learned to walk, talk and eat right on schedule. By the time he was 20 months old he could say atleast 30 words and he loved to play with friends. He could look at pictures and name everyone he saw. He recognized objects and named them. Basically, he was right on schedule developmentally speaking.

I really noticed something was wrong when he was 21 months old. One day, he simply stopped talking. I kept encouraging him to say please and thank you when receiving items from others and it was as if he forgot how to speak. He began to get more and more distant. If we called his name, he wouldn't respond. If we stomped around our old wooden floors, he wouldn't even look up. Eventually, we made an appointment to get his hearing checked, convinced that our son was going deaf. To our delight, the results came back totally normal. Logan could hear a whisper. But, what was wrong with him..... ? Why was he acting so odd?

Thus began a long and arduous journey of discovery, hearbreak and astonishment.
We spent the next year going to see Doctors, Psychiatrists, Psychotherapists, Child therapists and other assorted experts. He was diagnosed with PDD. Pervasive Development Disorder. Pervasive Development Disorder (PDD) is the collective term that is now being used for a group of developmental disorders of brain function with a broad range of behavioral consequences and severity. PDD manifests in infancy as impaired attachment but is more often identified in toddlers, mostly boys from 18 - 30 months of age when their parents or physician note an absence or delay of speech development and a lack of normal interest in other children or adults or a regression of early speech and sociability. These infants and children also do not know how to play. They manipulate or line up toys without apparent awareness of what the toys represent. They do not engage in pretend play. For example they do not play with the telephone which is a common natural occurrence in the development of virtually all children. They have several behavioral disturbances including shyness, fearfulness, anxiety or mood lability. They may have temper tantrums if someone tries to make them switch activities or if a ritual behavior is interrupted. They seem to have a decreased need for sleep and frequent awakenings during the night are not uncommon. It is not infrequent to find that these children are hypotonic, clumsy and often walk on their toes. They may have several motor stereotypic behaviors including hand flapping, spinning, running in circles, biting, head banging, and gouging. Classic autism is the best known subtype of this disorder and involves severe qualitative deficits in social interaction, language communication and play and is associated with stereotypic and perseverative behavior.
Logan began school when he was 3 years old in the preschool program PPCD. (Preschool program for children with disabilities) He has for the most part excelled in his schooling. This year has been the hardest. Temper tantrums have become a problem and he was recently moved to a new school to prevent him from hurting children smaller than himself. The school district and teachers have been very kind and helpful, with regards to his problems with violence.
He takes medications usually given to people with sever psychotic occurrences called Rispiradal. This has helped curb his outbursts and help him be able to focus more.
I know that parenting a child with special needs will make me a stronger and more emotionally rich person. Logan loves us, without any reservations. He loves to look at books, watch Disney movies, jump on the trampoline, swing, and swim.
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Here are a few more pics! (Kate, thanks for asking to see them... hehe)

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Thanks for looking! Please feel free to leave a comment or question!

Photography is something that I love. I love to look at photos, take photos and scrapbook photos. I love art books that feature photographs. It's just amazing to me how you can catch a moment. An image that will never be seen again, if not for that quick flash of the shutter. Photography means even more to me now that I have children. I love to document their childhood thru this medium. I haven't used a video camera in years.. I just prefer the still image. (They have less opportunity to show off, and more opportunity to show their true personality.)

Here are some random shots that I took outside. Let me know what you think! I have lots and lots more....

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Todays Freaky eBay auction includes this dy-no-mite two-headed troll

I promise you the copy is pasted verbatim. :lol:

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Vintage Uneeda 1965 two headed troll w/glass eyes.
Condition is EX, no cracks or holes.

Clayton was so excited about going to see the "Big Doctor"... Pronounced 'big dok-tew'. Damn, he's cute.

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We ended up with mostly good news. A trip to the hospital for an X-ray reveiled that Clay does NOT have a broken toe, but he does have the beginning of a nasty tissue infection. Keflex twice a day for 5 days and he will be good as new. Yay! We can live with that. It seemed all worth it, for the small price of stickers. It's amazing how a simple sticker or lollipop will just brighten a child's day. I'll have to remember that....

I took the plunge.

After only one week on tblog I submitted my blog to be a "feature".. Im not really sure what this entails, but since IRISH was sweet enough to give me tbucks I figured why the heck not. (smooches Irish).

If you like my blog, please vote for me.

I'm bribing people with the promise of a naked pic if I win. Hehe..

I'm shameless.

Please don't forget to vote on my poll. It's ok if you lie...


Hugs to everyone! <3>

And that is when you type an entire (long) blog and you hit publish... only for the computer to say "PAGE NOT FOUND"..


Grrrr... That pisses me off.

I'll retype it later.

I had never used a cock ring (or better yet, my HUSBAND hadn't used a cock ring) up until a few weeks ago. The story of us using this cock ring is hilarious...

We researched cock rings online for a few weeks. Porn sites, naughty toy stores, erotic stories. We wanted to have "all the facts"..... That's just NOT something I would want to fuck up. Know what I mean? I can imagine it now... [b]"HONEY, Its tangled in my PUBIC HAIR!!"[/b]

Anyway...

C and I like to budget our money. We don't normally buy a bunch of big ticket items unless we really need it. How hard could it be to find a "substitute" for a cock ring?

Well, I'm here to tell ya... It's pretty fuckin hard to find! We tried an O-ring first. You know what I'm talking about.. The type of thingy that you put on the back of a washing machine... Well, it wouldn't stretch very well. (Read - It was TOO small) Sooo, we decided what the hell.

We decided to use a rubber band.

Don't laugh. It sounded good at the time.

Me being a woman, I want the rubber band to be as tight as possible. (The tighter the better, right?) So, I wrap it around his cock.... Twice.

He grimaced a little but left it on... Well, we got into it pretty hot and heavy.... and his cock was HUGE. Much sooner than I would have liked he starts to slow down. I'm still clawing his chest and trying to keep him going. (Picture spurs and bronc riding) Suddenly, he stops. In mid-stroke. JENN, WE HAVE TO STOP!

Noooooo! Noooooo! You don't have to stop. It will be fiiiine. Keep going!

JENN WE HAVE TO STOP!

Ok... Fine.

By this time, he is doubled over in the middle of the bedroom, screaming at me to go get some scissors.

I felt this [u]had[/u] to be a bit drastic. Scissors!

Ohhhh, To cut the rubber band!! Gotcha.

Well, to make a long story longer.. I ran to the kitchen, got some scissors and flew back in to find his balls turning an odd burgundy color and his face closer to the color of white-out.

[b]HONEY, Its tangled in my pubic hair!![/b] At this point, I just collapse laughing. Poor C.. He didn't find it half as funny as I did.

Eventually, we did get the cock ring/rubber band/male torture device cut off his poor nutsack and he has thankfully made a full recovery.

I wonder if I can still talk him into trying a real one.....?

[image]JennsAbsent_353385 920.jpg[/image] [i]Does this little thing look dangerous? Tell me?!?![/i]

ebay offers a wide variety of features and services that enable members to buy and sell on the site quickly and conveniently. Buyers have the option to purchase items in auction-style format or items can be purchased at fixed price through a feature called Buy-It-Now. In addition, items at fixed price are also available Half.com, an eBay company.

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You can purchase everything from Cat figurines to Horse Saddles. Cars, trucks, motorcycles, airplanes, tricycles and bicycles. Pokemon, Barbie, Care Bears, Betty Boop and Tweety Bird. Negligees, thongs, bras, thigh-highs and garter belts. Boots, pumps, sandals, sneakers and loafers. Dildos, vibrators, nipple rings, crops, lubricants and porn movies.

You can get ANYTHING on eBay.
[b]
Todays freaky eBay auction:[/b]

[u][b]BADA BING NEON LIGHT SIGN BEER BAR-NO RESERVE [/b][/u]

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If you are looking for the perfect gift for that special person you have found it. It is in the red, white, and blue motif. This fabulous brand new neon sign measures 22 by 16 inches. This is a commercial grade neon sign and comes on a heavy black gauge grid and not plexiglass like many others. It can be wall mounted, free standing , or displayed in a window. It also comes with a chain for hanging if desired. This piece is shipped triple boxed with styrofoam and foam rubber to minimize breakage. And remember your buying from an Ebay powerseller so bid with confidence. My camera caught the reflection of another neon sign in the background. It is not included. Be sure and see my "about me" page for our "money back if your not thrilled" guarantee. We only ship to the continental United States.


NO RESERVE


Buyer to pay $30.00 for shipping and handling.


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Actually, I think this is kind of cute.. If I had a bar I would put it up.

I rate it: 3 stars

I was browsing blondebondgirl's blog when I found this blog about name meanings... Of course, I had to check it out.

Here are my results.

________:
You have a love of travel and adventure, and you enjoy sports. You also have a very strong sense of fair play and want justice. You can be quite inventive and quite curious. You can handle details well. You have a methodical mind. You must learn to give 'wise' service and not be a martyr. You are relatively demonstrative in your affections. You enjoy being stroked verbally and physically. You are naturally friendly. You can be the life of the party. You need to learn to be expressive. You are a person who cannot tolerate being misunderstood. You enjoy a challenge. You can take thought-directed actions.

_____:
You are fair-minded sometimes to the point of being opinionated. You have a strong need to be loved and appreciated. Your independence and freedom are important to you. You must learn to give 'wise' service and not be a martyr. You must learn to give 'wise' service and not be a martyr. You need to learn to be expressive. You are a person who cannot tolerate being misunderstood.


It's just frightening to me how this people can crawl into my head. :?

I just "bought" this new pop up window thingy... Can someone tell me how to change the text.... Pretty please!

As you can tell by all of my changes and blog entries today.. I'm hella bored.

[b]Nevermind, I figured it out.[/b] :roll:

I feel like I should be in a Julia Andrews movie. Complete with skipping, singing and flying on a magic umbrella. Spring is in the air!!! Can you smell it? The dogwood blossoms, honeysuckle vines and lilies have all begun to sprout their spring growth and fill the warm air with a delicious sweet scent. I remember the days of my youth when my brother and I would pick honeysuckle petals and suck the nectar.

A coupld of weekends ago we drove to Palestine (East Texas) to visit my Mom and Dad... Their place looked like spring personified. The bird feeders had visiters from sunup until sundown. I got some awesome shots of them feeding! Isn't this cardinal a majestic fellow.

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You can see who REALLY wears the pants in[u]that[/u] family with this photo. :lol:

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I look forward to Spring more than any other season. It's like a period of rebirth or 'new birth'. I have two different pairs of birds nesting on my front porch. Every morning I'm awakened to the twitter of what seems to be about 200 birds on my porch. Probably more like 4. Despite the supreme annoyance, I refuse to knock the nests down... Its just another reminder of Spring.

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I have an obsession...

I love Formula 409 Orange Clean!

Okay now you know.

I love the way it smells, the way it cleans everything so sterily white! I dig it man!

It brings me a clean shriek of joy and completeness.

I can create the most amazing layout designs when I'm on all fours seriously scrubbing the floors with this wicked good household cleaner, why is that?



Could the chemicals have a positive effect on me? Maybe it's just my inner "Alice", the housekeeper that is the creative one?

Hey you in the pink slippers, I'm watching you!

I'm sure that by now you've noticed my wandering eye and maybe began to wonder about my sanity. I'm just crazy, thanks!

Let me know what you think of my "spy eyes"!

Leave a comment!

I found a great site today. Thanks to DarkMood. If you haven't seen his site, I encourage you to check it out. His writing style is hilarious and his topics are great! Anyway, trixies-fantasy.com is the site to visit. She has everything you need to make your blog super cool...

I finally have time to sit down and blog about Ally's birthday party and my weekend in general. It's been crazy around here.

Ally had her party yesterday with all of her friends. It was a "dress-up" affair. Complete with makeup, high heels, fancy dresses and whatever else they could pile on. Well, let me just begin by saying that you haven't seen cute until you've seen 8 little girls dressed to the nines. What a scene! This is my Ally in a dress that was used in my girlfriends wedding, where she was the flower girl.

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This is my niece... She was sooo sweet. I had to tease her for the longest time to coax a smile from her...

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The only bad thing about hosting a party in your home is the utter chaos that you must contend with. C and I hosted approximately 30 people, with 14 of them being children. Hot dogs with chili and cheese and chips and dips. (Our family is very health conscious as you can tell... *snort*) My darlin husband had to work (I think he rigged it..), and so I had to prepare for the party by myself. Thankfully, (again, what LUCK!) he was able to get home about an hour before party time. My best friend WAS sweet enough to come over about noon to help me with the kids and the house. On a whole the shindig was a roaring success. The children had fun, ate tons of cake and candy and the grown ups grazed at the trough... Oopsss.. I mean the grownups had chili dogs..

:D

On a side note, My kiddo raked in the loot! I think she was even a little overwhelmed by all the gifts and attention. It does make me happy though... After all of the problems and stress that she had to endure last summer she deserves it. [b]Mommy loves Ally![/b]

Krista (my best friend) and I had alot of fun getting the kids and the house ready. I bought a plain cake and decorated the top with a ballerina embellishment from my scrapbooking paraphanelia. We also included fresh flowers and some pink beaded button thingys... I think it turned out cute.. Let me know what you think!

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Want to hear the best part of the whole affair? It was a sleep over. Yup. I'm a glutton for punishment. I had 4 little girls, between the ages of 8 and 10 ALL night. I'm sure that there are women out there that would scoff at my wimpiness when it comes to playin referee to 4 squeling preteens.. But, DAMN if I'm not freakin tired tonight. Just feeding the little animals is work in itself. The eat everything in sight. Tell me something... How does a lanky 10 year old put away 4 hot dogs? It's a mystery. I finally passed out at 11:30 after threatening them with bodily harm if they left the bedroom. Ally asked if they should just pee in the popcorn bowl. (Smartass.) Thankfully, they didn't end up having to lose a limb, and at the moment it's finally quiet on the homefront.

On an even more interesting note, C and I decided to paint the bathroom today! Like I said, glutton for punishment. We actually got it finished and put back together after only one small mishap. Except for Clayton sticking his entire bare foot into the paint tin things would have went off without a hitch. LOL! Picture a 3 year old with green paint up to their ankle. Fuckin funny!!

C and I did manage to catch a quikie while the children were jumping on the tramp during the afternoon. :D He has great endurance in the afternoons! (Of course, when you WANT it to be FAST and furious..) LOL!!

Status: Good.

Now this picture just fuckin scares me.

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Have you ever just closed your eyes, opened your mouth, and just screamed with everything you have? If you haven't, then you definitely need to!! It helps you relax to a degree that it comes close to the same feelings you might achieve after an orgasm. Especially if your having "one of those days"...

Remember, no baby screams. Give it ALL you got!

I found this picture on the net; it perfectly portrays my point.



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Chapter 3. Feelings and Attractions

Sensitive and sentimental, you are deeply attached to your family, old friends, familiar places and the past. You are romantic and tender in love, and the remembrance of birthdays, anniversaries, family rituals, and other days of personal significance is very important to you. You seek caring, emotional support, and security in love. You like to be needed, to cherish and protect your loved ones, and you are somewhat possessive of them.

There can be a lack of harmony or satisfaction in your romantic relationships--not necessarily a great deal of open conflict, but simply an underlying tension or discontent. This is because the people you find likeable, lovable, and agreeable to you may not be at all attuned to your sexual tastes and needs. Another, more direct way of saying this is, the people you love and the people you want to make love with are very different from one another. You may be confused about what you really need and want in personal relationships. You need to acknowledge that you have some conflicting desires (such as a partner who is very gentle and sensitive but also a powerful, dominant personality, or security and commitment in love but also a lot of freedom and excitement, etc.) Trying to satisfy both sides of the equation can be a tricky challenge.

Your love feelings are easily aroused and your romantic relationships begin with a sudden electric attraction, but they often end abruptly, and you may be in and out of love frequently--especially in your younger years. You crave emotional excitement and need to feel spontaneous and free, so you may avoid making firm personal commitments. Unusual or nontraditional forms of love and relationships appeal to you, and you are attracted to unique, creative, or unstable people.

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This is frighteningly familiar. I have had repeat problems with my personal relationships because of my tendency to seek something more exciting or different. I have realized that this is a part of myself that I will just have to bury or restrain. I hate that the laws of society and government can dictate how I live my life. But more importantly, I have to restrain my behaviour to protect my family. I truly desire the "all-american-family", although I would love to live a wild life. Riding around on a Harley, or traveling to tiny corners of the world. Making love in unusual places, eating new foods and drinking a new bottle of wine at every meal.

Alas... I will stay here. In my small home, with my wonderful husband and three beautiful children.

The Inner You: Your Real Motivation
You are, in many ways, an eternal child. Your mind is bright, alert, curious, flexible, playful, and always eager for new experiences - and your attention span is often quite brief. You grasp ideas quickly and once your initial curiosity has been satisfied, you want to go on to something else. You crave frequent change, variety, meeting new situations and people.

It may be hard for you to decide just where your talents and true vocation lie, for you have a multitude of interests and are loathe to limit yourself by concentrating on just one. You are easily distracted by all of the other fascinating possibilities. Your curiosity and restlessness propel you into many different experiences in life, and you are willing to taste or try anything once. Doing the same thing over and over again, even it is something you do well, is real drudgery for you.

You live in your head a great deal--reading, observing, thinking, spinning ideas around--and you need mental stimulation every bit as much as you need food and drink. In fact, if you had to choose between a good book or movie and a good lunch, you would very likely choose the former. You have a creative mind and often live by your wits.

You are also a very social creature, with a strong need to communicate and to interact with people. You enjoy using and playing with words and have a real flair for getting your ideas across in a clever, interesting, articulate manner. Writing or speaking are areas you have talent for.

You also have a rather light and mischievous sense of humor, and often do not take anything too seriously. Though you crave emotional involvement, it is hard for you to achieve it, for you are frequently unwilling to commit yourself to anything, to take responsibility, or to limit your personal freedom and mobility.

Your happiness lies in using your creativity and your language skills to communicate something meaningful, to teach, inspire, or bring people together. You have an unbiased mind and can usually offer a fresh, clear, uncluttered perspective. Your faults are your lack of constancy and persistence, and your tendency to overlook or ignore deep emotional issues and other people's feelings.

You have a mature and often somber demeanor. You are serious, reserved, self-disciplined, highly responsible and conscientious. You advance in life rather slowly, through your own efforts and persistence. You are also rather stern and judgmental, especially with yourself. Cautious and careful, it is difficult for you to really let go, to be spontaneous and playful. You like to be in control of yourself.

You are direct, energetic, sometimes aggressive and combative. You often feel that you need to fight to get what you want and you tend to have a "me-first" attitude that angers or irritates others. You are hasty, restless, impatient and sometimes reckless.

You are intensely willful, zealous, and fanatical, though often you hide the intensity of your feelings and your personal motives and desires. You have an infatuation with power and an almost compulsive desire for personal recognition, the desire to be Somebody. You tend to worship Heroes who have powerful personal magnetism and charisma, and often seek to emulate them. You also have both a fear of, and an intense fascination with, death and the hidden, secret, dark side of life.

The unusual and unorthodox appeal to you, and you do not allow tradition, convention, or other people's expectations to dictate how you are going to live your life. You crave freedom, adventure, excitement and discovery, and are not afraid of change. You possess inventive and creative genius.


------------------------- ------------------------- ---------------

It's just scary how true this stuff is...

Caramel Pecan Cheesecake

Ingredients
2 cups pecans
1/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup butter, melted
26 caramels
1-1/2 Tablespoons sweetened condensed milk
Four 8-ounce packages cream cheese, softened
1 cup sugar
3 large eggs
1 Tablespoon vanilla extract
1 cup chilled whipping cream
2 Tablespoons sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Finely grind nuts and sugar in processor. Add melted butter and blend until moist crumbs form. Press crumb mixture onto bottom only of springform pan. Cook caramels and milk until melted. Drizzle over crust. Using electric mixer, beat cream cheese and sugar in large bowl until well blended. Add eggs 1 at a time, beating just to combine after each addition. Mix in vanilla. Pour filling into crust. Bake until top appears dry and cheesecake no longer moves in center when pan is shaken, about 1 hour. Cool, cover and refrigerate over night. Release pan sides from cheesecake. Beat whipping cream, sugar, and vanilla extract in medium bowl to stiff peaks. Serve with whipped cream!

Good enough to make you wanna slap yur mama!

A single mother and her little girl were out and about, doing those family errands one must contstantly do, when the girl out of the blue, asked her mother, 'Mommy, How old are you?'

The mother responded, 'Honey, women don't talk about their age. You'll learn this as you get older.

The girl then asked, 'Mommy, how much do you weigh?'

Her mother responded again, 'That's another thing women don't talk about. You'll learn this, too, as you grow up.'

The little girl, still in her inquisitive child mood, fires off another question: 'Mommy, Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?'

The mother, a little annoyed by the questions, responded, 'Honey, that is a subject that hurts me very much, and I don't want to talk about it now.'

The little girl, frustrated, sulks until she is dropped off at a friend's house to play. She consults with her girlfriend about her and her mother's conversation. The girlfriend says, 'All you have to do is sneak and look at your mother's driver's license. It's just a like a report card from school. It tells you everything.'

Later, the little girl and her mother are out and about again. The little girl starts off with, 'Mommy, Mommy, I know how old you are! I know how old you are! You're 32 years old!'

The mother is moderately shocked, and asks, 'Sweetheart, how do you know that?'

The little girl shrugs and says, 'I just know. And I know how much you weigh. You weigh 130 pounds!'

'Where did you learn that?'

The little girl says, 'I just know. And I know why you and daddy got a divorce. You got an 'F' in sex.'

Well, today is the day. At last! Ally's birthday party..I thought the child was going to drive me to drink before the actual party day arrived.

I have ALOT to do today though... Cleaning house, making a card, decorating wrapping paper, wrapping gifts, cooking, picking up the cake, and all of the other endless little details that come up on the day of a party. Regardless, I'm going to make sure that Ally Kat has the best party possible.

Wish me luck.

Don't answer that. :lol:

I am starting to get a bit nervous about my lack of comments.. If anyone, [u]anyone at all[/u], reads this please let me know that I'm not all alone out here in cyberspace.

Signed,
Lonely blogger

1. What is your most prized material possession?

My Canon digital rebel. No guessing about it. I love that camera more than I love my dog. Well, maybe not that much. Its close though.

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2. What item, that you currently own, have you had the longest?

A blue and white comforter that my Mom gave me when I was 12 when she redecorated my room. Pictures from when I was a wee child. A scrapbook that my girlfriend and I made when we were 9 or 10. (We are still best friends.) My blanket gets used every single day though.

3. Are you a packrat?

No. I'm a very neat person. Anally so.

4. Do you prefer a spic-and-span clean house? Or is some clutter necessary to avoid the appearance of a museum?

I have 3 children, a husband and 2 dogs. It will never be "spic-and-span". But, I do like to keep things picked up. There are always cups in the sink, toys in the floor and lotion at my desk. But everything has a [u]purpose[/u].

5. Do the rooms in your house have a theme? Or is it a mixture of knick-knacks here and there?

Yes it has a theme. Early contemporary hand-me-down. But, its nice hand-me-downs. My inlaws have excellent taste and the money to indulge their taste. We get all the castoffs when the get sick of stuff. (After about a year and a half. :roll:)

I spent almost the entire day with Mom and I'm still as worried as ever. She tires so easily. How horrible it must be, for a woman of 47 to feel her body give out on her already. I hope she realizes how much we love her, how much we need her.

We had a little accident today while out shopping. Mom was taking Clay to the restroom, as she was opening the door it caught his big toe and ripped the toenail halfway off. OUCH! I could hear my poor baby wailing from two aisles over "MOMMMMA MOMMMMMA"... If that isn't enough to break your heart, here comes Mom caring Clay and she is completely wasted from having to walk 30 feet carrying him. [u]That[/u] broke my heart. Clayton's toe will heal... I want my Mommy back.

By Rich Cholodofsky
TRIBUNE-REVIEW
Thursday, January 8, 2004


A Mt. Pleasant Township couple wants Wal-Mart to pay for foot and toe injuries they claim were caused by canned goods and condiments that tumbled from an overfilled plastic grocery bag.
According to a two-count civil lawsuit filed Wednesday in Westmoreland County, Brenda and Ronald Sager contend a plastic bag they brought home from the East Huntingdon Township store last month was deficient and overstuffed.

The bag, which contained a 32-ounce jar of Miracle Whip, a 46-ounce bottle of ketchup, three 15-ounce cans of fruit, an 18-ounce bottle of ranch dressing and a 12-ounce bottle of mustard, broke open when the Sagers returned home and started to put away their groceries.

That's when the handle tore and the bottom of the bag broke, the Sagers claim. "... all of the contents of said small plastic bag immediately fell onto and struck the right ankle, foot and toes of the plaintiff, Brenda Sager," the lawsuit said.

The 14-page complaint filed by attorney John Scales claims Brenda Sager suffered numerous injuries including cracked and damaged toenails. Brenda Sager also claims she sustained more serious permanent injuries and other physical problems, such as ligament damage and a broken right foot.

The Sagers contend Wal-Mart was at fault for her injuries. The store, they claim, failed to properly instruct and train its employees to correctly bag products, negligently provided a defective bag, recklessly overpacked the bag by placing in it too many heavy items, failed to double- or triple-bag the purchases, and placed Brenda Sager in a "position of peril."

She is seeking damages in excess of $30,000.

Her husband also is seeking that amount in damages, claiming that as a result of his wife's injuries he has been deprived of her attention and comfort and suffered a loss of consortium.

An official of Wal-Mart yesterday denied the accusations.

Store co-manager Scott Kubica said Wal-Mart workers did nothing wrong and did not overpack the Sagers' bag.

"Those bags are good for 10 or 15 pounds," Kubica said.

There apparently is no industry standard for packing grocery bags, according to an official with the National Grocer's Association, a Virginia-based organization that operates an annual competition for grocery bagging.

"Bags tend to be underpacked," said NGA staffer Karen Vorhees.

In competition, baggers are judged on the speed in which they pack bags as well as weight distribution among the bags. Points are subtracted for broken bags.

In their lawsuit, the Sagers said Wal-Mart should have made sure their bag didn't break.

The store "failed to use two or three bags or whatever number of bags were necessary to accommodate the heavy items placed in said bag."



[b]Geez.[/b]

I still need to get my picture taken with a Real transvestite midget.

Seriously, I must have my photo taken with a transvestite midget as soon as possible.

Preferably with a gold studded front tooth.
[image]JennsAbsent_456056 882.gif[/image]

I'm worried about Mom.

Her health doesn't seem to be improving and she is always lethargic and sick. Her heart isn't as strong as it used to be.

Let me give a brief bit of history. When mom was 32 she started to get ill. One doctor diagnosed her with broncitis. So, basically she was experiencing cold and flu type systems. With the emphasis being on respiratory problems. (Taking into account, that I was a freshman in high school and most of these memories are very sketchy.) Fast forward a few months... She finally went to see a heart specialist who immediately diagnosed her with cardiomyopathy. She was admitted into the hospital [u]that day[/u]. Her condition was critical. The doctors told us that mom needed a heart transplant or she would die. She was then put on the transplant list and 3 weeks later she got the gift of a new heart. That was 15 years ago. Now this...

She was recently diagnosed with Hepatits C; which she probably contracted thru a blood transfusion during the transplant surgery. Hepatitis C can lie unnoticed for years and years. A fact which I just recently learned.

Anyway.

Mom is sick again. I'm worried.

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker. I began to think alone - "to relax," I told myself. But I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

Things weren't going so great at home either. One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's. I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the boss called me in. He said, "Skippy, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job." This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..." "I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!" "But Honey, surely it's not that serious." "It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking we won't have any money!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I'd had enough. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door. I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche, with NPR on the radio. I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors... they didn't open. The library was closed. To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.

As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker's Anonymous poster.

Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed... easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.

Have you ever felt like something small saves your sanity every single day? Like your vehicle? What would you do without your trusty Toyota? A morning walk.. your daily crossword puzzle. Or that ever traditional strawberry poptart that you just can't seem to do without. For me, it's coffee. JAVA! I can't function without my daily pot. (of coffee) :) Nothing feels right if I don't have that tasty concoction to start my day. I become irritable and bitchy. My feet are sluggish and my bed looks more like heaven than a place to simply sleep. Mmmm..... Sipppp. Warm, sweet and slighly bitter. Nothing beats that distinctive coffee taste. I must admit (somewhat ashamed) that I have become completely addicted to Starbucks coffee. Not the take out stuff but the bag stuff that you brew at home. It's $6.99 for a 12oz bag, but I just can't seem to live without this stuff. Oh well, it could be worse. Cheers.

This morning as I was helping Ally get ready for school I thought of something. Before too long she will be starting her period, then she will be dating boys and before long she will be off to college in some far away evil place. Will I be able to handle it? Can I let her grow up and become her own person, no matter who she chooses to become? I just don't know........ Have I taught her the things she will need to know to survive in the world. To handle things with class and a sense of self. I hope that I have taught her who she is. More than anything I want her to have a strong sense of self. To never backdown from a fight, but to always walk away from something or someone that makes her uncomfortable. I'm so ambiguous at times... My wish for you Ally is that you would become a strong, moral and adventurous person. It's ok to try new things, but let your heart lead you. If it feels wrong, it IS wrong. Look inside yourself for the answers. Don't let ANYONE dictate to you what you should think or do in any situation. I believe in you.

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I feel like I need a nap now... LOL

It's good to know that if I work hard enough and pull enough of my hair out that I can figure shit out.

Eventually.

Ok.. Here goes.

Well, I screwed that up. Let's try this again.


Fuming. Is 3rd time really a charm?

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The entire intent of the last post was to share the news of my daughters 8th birthday today. Geez.

Anyway.

My sweet girl is turning the big 08. I wish she would act 8 instead of 18. Don't get me wrong, I don't have one of those Jerry Springer nightmares on my hands, but she does like to mother people. I'm not looking forward to those preteen days at all. Any advice for not poking my eyes out with a pencil because my kid can't find her hairbrush, please respond.

I'm 30 years old, actually closer to 31 than 30, now that I think about it. If you are 18 years old and reading this with the thought "Dayum, this chic is [b]OLD[/b]!" then just keep on clicking. I'm not over the hill, I'm looking at that hill and [i]laughing my ass off[/i].

18 wasn't good to me.. Between the countless days spent drunk and wondering how I was going to find my way back home, working entirely too much, and getting my heart broke, turning 19 felt like a break.

Unbeknownst to me 19 wouldn't be much better. I got pregnant with my first child by yet another man that would come to break my heart. On the brightside, I did manage to meet and fall in love with the man of my dreams as a result of this.

20 was spent taking care of the new baby and forging a life for myself and my family. A pretty good year.

21 came and went in a blur. C and I became more adventurous in our personal life and started venturing out of this house to do more than eat at Applebees. :wink:

From the age of 21 to (almost 31) I've managed to rack up quite a life resume.

To recap...

Baby #2 at the tender age of 22.

Baby #3 at the ripe old age of 27.

A short career as a waitress at a strip club.

6 months without C while I was making the biggest mistake of my life with J.

A stay in the looneybin. (Timberlawn mental hospital) I promise I'm not crazy folks... Really. :D


Careers to date:
Selling Kitchen Tools
Selling Beauty products
Telephone company operator (Think 411..)
Cocktail Waitress
Scrapbook artist
Secretary/Receptionist

Now I just consider myself a Domestic Goddess.

My first blog entry.


I'm beginning with the lyrics to one of the best songs ever. :wink: If anyone would like to help me figure out how to load an mp3 I would greatly appreciate it.

More to follow.... But for now...

Alanis Morrisette


[i]"Uninvited"

Like anyone would be
I am flattered by your fascination with me
Like any hot-blooded woman
I have simply wanted an object to crave
But you, you're not allowed
You're uninvited
An unfortunate slight

Must be strangely exciting
To watch the stoic squirm
Must be somewhat heartening
To watch shepherd need shepherd
But you you're not allowed
You're uninvited
An unfortunate slight

Like any uncharted territory
I must seem greatly intriguing
You speak of my love like
You have experienced love like mine before
But this is not allowed
You're uninvited
An unfortunate slight

I don't think you unworthy
I need a moment to deliberate [/i]